Hugo: Big Disappoiontment

I recently ordered Hugo  on Netflix based on that critical acclaim and hype, yet the film fell far short of my expectations.  The setting and cinematography were well done, and the characters did a fine job at their roles, but the plot moved at too slow a pace for my liking.  At the thirty minute mark I wondered when something exciting would happen, at 45 minutes I decided I would turn off the movie if it didn't improve by the one hour mark, and at one hour I did just that.  The dry nature of the plot, and the lack of any action lost my interest from the start.  Some suspense hung in the air, and the movie seemed to edge closer to some complex connection between relative strangers; however, it was nothing so entertaining that kept me on the edge of my chair wanting to know how it would play out.  If you need movies to capture your interest quickly as I do then I would not recommend devoting two hours of your time to Hugo.  It feels like it's been a while since I wrote about a movie that I didn't like very much...it's about time I became more critical.  Here's a trailer; maybe you can see why I thought this movie might be decent.

Darkhorse Movie Alert: Anonymous

For anybody who is a fan of the great playwright William Shakespeare, or a fan of the Renaissance and Elizabethan culture and wouldn't be offended by the notion the Shakespeare didn't actually write his plays; I'm sure you would love the movie Anonymous.  This film tosses out the idea that William Shakespeare, who was supposedly the son of an illiterate peasant and was himself illiterate, did not write his plays, but was simply a cover for a nobleman who could not openly admit to being a playwright.  And no that is not a spoiler because the trailer and synopsis would have revealed such information.  I honestly was not very excited about this movie.  I had this feeling when I received it from Netflix like I didn't really want to watch it, and I almost send the movie back without watching it.  Over some free time today I decided to give the movie a chance and I do not regret it at all.

The scenery, costumes, and cinematography were all magnificent.  Everything looked authentic and artistic, so much more than I've seen in other Oscar-winning movies such as Shakespeare in Love.  I'm still in awe at the care taken to show the authenticity of the setting, and all of the actors played their parts in a most authentic manner.  I could not have been more pleased with this movie, as it set out what the plot intended and so much more.  If you enjoy artsy movies and time pieces this is definitely a movie for you.  The plot is excellent and throws you for a major loop that may make a prudish person gasp.  I'm struggling to come up with more words that will urge you to watch this movie, but trust me, if you like quality movies then you will love this movie.  Go see Anonymous, and you won't regret it.

Avengers Review

I saw The Avengers  on Thursday.  Honestly, I don't think it lived up to the hype.  I know it had the biggest opening weekend ever, but honestly I didn't think it was great.  And I promise, I'm not just saying this to uphold my prediction that this movie was going to blow; I thought it was good, not great. 

Let me begin by telling you everything that I liked.  Nearly all of the characters were awesome(except for Capt. America), and my favorite, the Hulk, was a major badass.  Scarlet Johansson looked hot as always, and Robert Downey was hilarious (I know I've said it before, but has there ever been a stronger comeback in the history of Hollywood?).  The action sequences were well done and somewhat suspenseful.  Loki, who plays the villain, also did a great job portraying the ultimate villain from another world.  I could have done without his horned helmet though; it was too much like Hellboy's horns. 

I'm drifting into my critiques, so here we go.  First of all, Captain America.  The Captain America movie sucked (Upsetting b/c my nickname in student teaching was Capt. America), and Chris Evans didn't do much better in the Avengers.  I don't even think it's his fault.  Compared to all of the other Avengers Captain America just comes up short, but he's an Avenger so they can't leave him out. 

I also wasn't really big on the alien army commanded by Loki.  They flew these giant, metal beasts that looked like a cross between a sea turtle and a moray eel.  Those were kind of weird, and then they never did any close-ups of the foot soldiers.  I for one was curious as to what they looked like beneath their masks.  Sure they put up a good fight and added to a sweet action sequence, but I would have been ok with some more back story on the aliens and some close ups. 

And then there was the attempt at developing Black Widow's character.  I didn't like how they started to reveal some things about her past and then just swooped away from it.  Black Widow and Night Hawk (I think that's Jeremy Renner's character's name) were the only two Avengers who didn't have their own movies, so naturally some more back story would have been nice, but with so many characters it seemed difficult for them to develop some of the minor Avengers.  That's one of the major drawbacks with having so many heroes in one movie, and I hope that Renner and Johansson's characters provide more details about their past in the sequel (Yes people, the sequel has already been green lit). 

Again, I'll admit that I may be somewhat biased because my prediction flopped, but I still affirm that the movie was good, not great.  The two people I know who saw it disagree and absolutely loved it, so I advise you to make your own judgement.  Go see this one in the theater; it's probably worth it if you like comic book movies.  Here's a trailer:

A Delicious Plethora of Summer Releases

Hopefully my title will keep you interested because I'm running on fumes, and as a result the writing is likely to suffer.  I didn't sleep well last night as a result of eating late, outside noise, and weird dreams.  I sleep with my window open now that it's not freezing outside to get rid of stale musty air; I can't stand the smell of stale air.  On top of a lackluster slumber I decided it would be a good idea to suit up and jump into practice with my high school laxers.  That's right friends, coach Yonni for those of you who didn't already know.  The season's just about over and I loved every minute of it; except for getting beamed in the shins with shots today.  That's certainly the one thing I don't miss about playing goalie in lacrosse.  I'm sad to see the season end, but so happy that I got to coach; it's been one of my dreams for a while now. 

Anyway, even in my semiconscious state I'm ecstatic about some of the movies that will come out this summer and fall.  The summer always provides a few great blockbusters i.e The Dark Knight Rises and The Amazing Spiderman.  Of course there's always The Avengers, which I was apparently dead wrong about.  Biggest opening weekend ever...nice miss there Yonni saying it would be a bust.  Still, I want to see it so I can make my own judgement.   That aside, I've provided a few trailers of movies that I think will rock your socks just as much as those loveable super heroes and comic book characters.

Argo, the third movie directed by Ben Affleck, details a government plot to rescue a small number of US Embassy workers during the Iran hostage crisis in the eighties.  The movie looks very well done, and features a cast with seasoned actors such as Ben Affleck, Alan Arkin, and John Goodman.  Let's be honest people, Ben Affleck's directed two movies and they both killed it.  You better believe I'm pumped for this movie, as I've been anxiously awaiting the next Affleck film since I saw The Town.

Critics have said  that Killer Joe may be Matthew McConaughey's best performance ever, and the film intrigues me.  I love how the trailer doesn't give away the full plot line of the movie, preparing any would be viewer for a film that is sure to have intense and unexpected plot twists.  The basic plot involves a young man played by Emile Hirsch who looks to hire a contract killer (McConaughey) to kill his mother so that he can collect insurance money.  As the plot grows it seems that the contract and the killer are far from what any of the involved individuals expected, leading to numerous unpleasant surprises.  The movie looks different and somewhat quirky, but I still think it's going to emerge as a dark horse treat for avid fans of the cinema.  Don't short change this film; I have a good feeling about it.  It reminds me of some of the earlier Tarantino films like Pulp Fiction.  And don't crucify me for making a Tarantino comparison, at least not until you see Killer Joe.

I could be literary and proper about the next movie, but that would be hiding my true feelings and emotions.  Gangster Squad looks fucking awesome.  Every few years a movie about organized crime comes out the captures even the interest of critics and the Academy because it's that good i.e American Gangster and L.A. Confidential.  I think this could be the next film to join the class of organized crime movies that are not simply shoot-em-up action movies but intricate and well made crime stories.  The cast is loaded with seasoned veterans of Hollywood like Sean Penn, Nick Nolte, and Josh Brolin while adding in some of Hollywood's great young talent in Ryan Gosling, Giovanni Ribisi, along with the beautiful Emma Stone.  The movie has all of the ingredients to kill, and I have no doubts that it will do just that.  Out of these three movies I think I'm most excited for Gangster Squad.  Expect to see plenty of advertisements for this movie, it's going to be huge. 

Girls

Some people have raved about the new HBO show, Girls, but I for one am not impressed.  I must confess that I continue to watch the show only because it intrigues me.  The show features a boring plot and underdeveloped characters who lead quite boring lives.  Everything that the characters go through is quite ordinary, and it's one of the few shows (and possibly the only) I have ever seen that features so many unattractive people.  I'm not one to talk, I mean I consider myself mildly good looking, but not having a female counterpart for nearly two years definitely takes away from my credibility as an attractive heterosexual male.  But honestly, watch the trailer I post and tell me that the lead character isn't quite unattractive.  Sure sure, true beauty is on the inside and I'm absolutely positive (well not really) that she's a lovely person, but since when has Hollywood thought that way?

What I'm trying to get at here is that although I'm not a huge fan of the show, I'm intrigued by the fact that this show is so much like real life that it's scary.  Ask yourself this:  Why do we watch fictional television shows, movies, and read fictional books? I think it's to see the possibility of our dreams coming true, or something absolutely amazing happening to just about anyone.  The problem is that 98% of the things that happen in movies don't happen in real life, and the things that do don't happen to ordinary looking people.  Take romantic comedies for instance.  I mean who really just wakes up one morning after having a platonic relationship with somebody for years and all of a sudden realizes they're in love? It just doesn't happen.  It's just a whole bunch of bullshit that keeps the dreamers dreaming, but at least it can be funny bullshit.

So back to Girls.  The main character, Hannah, is a college graduate who struggles to find a steady job, even entry level.  There are thousands is not millions of young people in the same boat these days, hence very realistic.  Besides her lack of good looks, Hannah is stuck in a purely sexual relationship with a guy who treats her like shit.  Hmmmm, girl who likes being treated like shit...sounds like a couple of females that I might know.  Hannah's roommate, Marnie (aka gorgeous) has a job, but is stuck in a relationship with her college boyfriend who she no longer has feelings for.  Who hasn't been in one of those relationships where you just drag it out because it's comfortable? There are plenty of married couples out there who have that same back story.  Oh please, don't make me spoil it...oh fuck it.  SPOILER ALERT:  So Hannah eventually contracts an STD, HPV, to be exact, after she has sex with only two people, and mind you it was protected sex with both.  Life is largely about luck, and often times bad things happen to good people.  Hannah took all the care in the world and she got screwed over with the STD.  WTF right?

Here's a pic of Allison Williams who plays Marnie. Hot right? That was rhetorical.

 

Although I don't find the show all that great, I must say that this show is the closest thing to actual reality TV that I can think of.  There's no scripted bullshit drama, just a storyline with real, ordinary-looking people, with real world problems.  For that reason it's really not all that entertaining, but it's still a television anomaly.   And then there's Shoshanna, the super jappy Long Island girl.  She's one of the most entertaining characters, for me at least.  Here's some media for you.  Chime in friends. 

Here's the whole cast.  From left to right and with their character's names: Marnie, Shoshanna, Hannah, and Jessa.  

 

And in usual Yonni fashion here's the trailer for your viewing pleasure.

A Clash of Kings

I finished reading book A Clash of Kings: Book Two of A Song of Ice and Fire, and like it's predecessor, A Game of Thrones, it didn't disappoint.  I'll attempt to complete this review with as little spoiling as possible for those of you who are still watching the series or haven't yet read the books.  The story did a nice job following the struggles of the main characters while adding in some new viewpoints such as that of Davos Seaworth, aka the Onion Knight and King Stannis' right hand.  The second installment introduces us to many new lords, ladies, knights and kings, all of whom fight for the iron throne (or support one of the sides fighting for it) and control over the seven kingdoms of Westeros.  There's plenty of action, love, betrayal, and cruelty throughout the story, and Martin provides many plot twists that would leave any seasoned reader very surprised.  Martin uses excellent wording and conventions to construct a piece that tells a story from a different time period.  I personally enjoy his frequent use of creative similes.  It's very difficult to write a review without giving too much away, but I'll say that Martin gives you the battle that many of you long for, and you may be surprised by the result (I know I was). 

No no no, it's not all good.  What kind of critic would I be if I just praised the shit out of this book? One that would hopefully have a nice payday coming from the publishers.  I personally do not like weak character development, and Martin falls into this pitfall quite often.  Many lords and ladies are introduced in important forums and then disappear for the rest of the book.  For instance, Walder Frey, Lord of the Twins, plays a crucial role in King Robb's war effort, and is then forgotten for the rest of the book.  Same goes for Lysa Arryn who I believe is only mentioned in Book Two, but never once makes an appearance (Lady Arryn played a significant and entertaining role on Book one).  The Vale, Lady Arryn's kingdom, supposedly has a strong number of knights that simply sit tight at the Eyrie, never joining the melee.  I attribute the loss of these characters to the vast number of characters introduced by Martin, and I just don't see the point of mentioning so many different people if Martin doesn't plan on developing their characters.  Keeping track of everyone can be a grueling feat in itself, and by not giving characters any significance, Martin simply fills pages with words (900-1000 pages per book so we know he's good at that). 

Martin's story mostly follows logic and is believable except for a few main mistakes.  SPOILER ALERT: I don't get Robb sending Theon to his father, Balon Greyjoy for his aid.  Nedd Stark, Robb's father, defeated Greyjoy in battle when he rebelled, killed two of  Balon's sons, and took the third hostage (Theon) to serve as his steward.  I don't see how Robb would think that Balon Greyjoy would ever have been his ally.  Plus, once home, why would Theon come back to Robb under his own free will to fight a north man's war? Doesn't make sense to me.  Another part that I disagreed with was Martin trying to sell the readers that Bran and Rickon were killed by Theon.  Their death was mentioned in a calm and anti-climactic fashion.  For Bran, one of the more intriguing characters, to die such an unceremonious death made no sense and didn't fool me. 

My other critiques are more minor, yet to me they make a difference in the quality of the story.  At times Martin places a great amount of detail into describing armor, scenery, and clothing, and it can be a bit much.  I think that it breaks up his rhythm when Martin goes on and on about how a character is dressing on his or her way to a significant conflict.  Who cares? Just get to the battle or argument to see what happens.  The story also features many instances of rape, some of which are described in a bit too much detail for my taste.  I understand that one of the horrors of war is usually rape and pillaging that hurts the civilians most of all, but must there be so much? Rape is horrible, and it grosses me out, and I could do with a bit less rape. 

Here's a trailer of the second season of HBO's Game of Thrones which closely mirrors the events of A Clash of Kings.  Enjoy.

New Spider Man

Usually I would think it pretty dumb for a movie trilogy to change the lead character, but when it comes to Spiderman I don't mind because I'm not a huge Tobey Maguire fan, and the last movie was so terrible that it's probably best to wipe the slate clean and start fresh.  Now, I'm not the biggest Andrew Garfield (The Social Network) fan, but I'm pretty sure he can do a better job than Tobey Maguire, and I love Emma Stone as MJ, so scratching Kirsten Dunst from that role is fine by me.  I still can't believe Emma Stone's a natural blonde-I prefer her with auburn or brown hair-but anyway, back to my thoughts on the new movie, The Amazing Spiderman.

The effects look great, as they should because it would be quite difficult to half a real person swinging between skyscrapers, and I like that the movie is taking the prequal angle of telling the story of Peter's parents.  In all of the other movies you never hear anything about Peter's parents; it simply jumps to the time when he lives with his aunt and uncle.  The plot angle for the movie is a great way for the producers and director to start from scratch and rebuild the Spiderman movies into something bigger and better.

On a more personal note, I always liked Spiderman.  I never read the comics, but he always seemed like a cool superhero, and the first two movies were solid, minus Tobey Maguire.  I'm not really sure why I like Spiderman-I mean he's certainly not my favorite comic book character-but who doesn't want to swing from tall buildings and have superior climbing and jumping ability.  Anyway, I'm glad to see the Spiderman movies get a facelift, especially after the abysmal third installment.  I should probably have some more technical analysis for you all, but I honestly just have a gut feeling that this movie will be solid.  Go see The Amazing Spiderman to rid yourself of the bad taste left by Spiderman 3.  

 

The Loved Ones

I don't usually like horror movies, but I just watched a trailer for a movie that looks excellent.  Most horror movies come up with some unbelievable plot and inhuman behaviors, coupled with superhuman strength and complete naivety.   The movies that I find scariest are the ones about true stories or stories that could be true.  For instance, Wolf Creek (2005) chronicles the story of a real-life Australian serial killer who lured families into his home by disabling their cars and then offering them help.  The killer would drug his or her victims with tainted water and would then slower torture and eventually kill the victims.  Worst part: the killer was never caught and it really happened. 

Another movie that scared me was the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974).  This country has plenty of backwoods towns and communities that are off the grid.  Who knows what could happen in such deprived and secluded areas when you throw disease, radiation, and possibly inbreeding into the mix.  I'm not sure if it's a true story, and honestly I'm a bit too tired to do my research right now, but even if Texas Chainsaw Massacre isn't a true story, it's certainly believable. 

And now the latest film that looks like it might actually scare me a bit: The Loved Ones (2012).  This film appears to follow a disturbed adolescent girl who wants nothing more than to take her crush to the end of the year dance.  When she is shot down by the boy, who already has another date (who appears to be his girlfriend), the disturbed girl enlists the help of her father for a night the boy will never forget.  The movie looks to involve plenty of torture with power tools. The cover shot shows the disturbed leading lady clutching a power drill, and I think it's safe to assume that she's not making repairs on her home.  

But this could never happen right? I mean what kind of person would actually kidnap and torture a crush just because he or she shot them down? It seems realistic enough to me, especially with all of these new cases of teen suicide.  Teens today have it pretty rough, and what's to say that someone couldn't be pushed to the point of kidnapping, assault, and torture.  If someone is prepared to take their own life, then they would most likely have no problem taking someone else's life.   Forgive my endorsement of this cliche, but "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned."  This movie looks scary and realistic enough for a horror movie.  I also detect British accents which add just a little more spice to this appealing film.  Leave comments with your thoughts after viewing the trailer below: