Being single on New Year's, not the end of the world

The two occasions that really suck the most when you are single are New Year's Eve and Valentine's Day.  Both days are occasions that allow for couples to come together and spend the evening together; usually in a way that is more special than the average night.  Whether it be a romantic dinner for two on Valentine's Day or a classy party on New Year's Eve both occasions are not the average Friday Night.  Some people become upset on these occasions when they see other happy couples enjoying their time together, while they stand alone on the holidays.  Being that I am single this year for New Year's I have vowed to not let it ruin my evening, and I will instead go and have as much fun as possible with a small collection of close friends. 

The single life really isn't all that bad on an everyday basis.  Nobody nagging you to do something you may not necessarily want to do and no significant other to shell out money on.  Being single certainly has its perks of freedom and free time, yet at times when couples shine such freedom turns to loneliness and emptiness for some.  These feelings can make people sad on such happy occasions unless such people make a conscious effort to ignore their relationship status and focus on the task at hand: having fun.  Tonight I plan on having a great time with friends, drinking, eating, dancing, and enjoying life to the fullest.  I am vowing to have fun even though I am single and will probably remain that way come the end of the night.  I believe that it is very important for people to have fun without the necessity of external parties or circumstances such as a bar, alcohol, or a significant other.  If you cannot have fun on your own than you are probably not very fun around others either.  In my opinion a significant other is a bonus to what should already be a happy and fun life.  Don't bank on someone else for happiness or a fun time, but create your own good time.   Go crazy and rock out even if you're single on New Year's, Valentine's, or any other night for all of you singles like me. 

What did we do before cell phones?

I remember the times earlier in my childhood when it seemed like the only people who had cellular phones were high powered business men and women.  Now you see every man, woman, and many children using their phones everywhere they go, constantly talking, texting, or partaking in some other function of their smart phones (apps, games, etc).  Sure it's nice  to talk to those we care about when they are not right in front of us, and cell phones allow us to do this anywhere we have service.  I'm not completely against cell phones, I even have a Blackberry, showing that I not only have a cell phone but a smart phone.  In reality I really don't need the machine; I bought it solely for the purpose of promptly responding to my graduate school email account (the pressing situation that has required such a prompt response has not yet presented itself).  I'm not against cell phones, and I will acknowledge that they make life far easier for many people.  Simply put, I wonder if people remember that they were able to survive just fine without cell phones.


So often I'll see people who constantly have their phones out when in the company of others, texting, or playing on certain applications.  Some of those same people would freak out if they misplaced their phone, as if their lives couldn't go on if they did not have a phone on their person.  I try to distance myself from reliance on a phone from time to time.  For instance, today I went to Starbucks and read for about 3 hours.  I turned my phone on vibrate and left it in my jacket pocket so that I would not be disturbed my any calls or texts.  These times can be very relaxing, knowing that nobody that you actually know can or will bother you for the duration of time you choose to ignore your phone.  Some people prefer the possibility of being contacted at any time of the day; I am not amongst those.  At some points I find it very important to take alone time for yourself with no distractions from others to simply enjoy life, and utilize self-reflection.

Then again, I could just be a pessimist because in my social circle I receive the least amount of calls or texts.  When out with friends most of the other people are constantly buzzing or beeping while my phone sits silently in my pocket with no new alerts to share.  If my phone was contacted more often I may fancy the device more, yet presently my phone is rarely utilized or necessary.  In any case I think it's important for everyone to take alone time every now and then and have some personal self-reflection that does not involve work or school.  Turn off your phone, computer, fax machine, and any other medium of technology that allows others to contact you.  Relax and reflect on the positives in life, and how you can change any of the negative aspects that you have control over.  Humans existed for centuries and millenia  before all of our current technology existed and sometimes I fear that we have become too reliant on such technology.  Every once in a while leave the phone at home, and embrace the world as we once did. 

Be considerate of your fellow man or woman

While driving to work yesterday I witnessed a man doing one of the most inconsiderate things that I have seen in a while. He was shoveling his driveway and throwing the snow from his driveway onto the newly paved road in front of his house.  Apparently his lawn was too significant and fragile to take on anymore snowfall so this man's solution was to throw snow into the street.  I really wanted to honk at him or at possibly even take the bastard out but instead I just laughed as i drove over his small pile in the middle of the road.  It amazes me how some people so rarely consider that they share the planet with about seven billion other humans.  So many individuals act selfishly throughout their entire lives, as if they rule the world.  If people were less selfish and more considerate problems such as poverty, pollution, persecution, violence, and so many more of today's issues would not be considered national and/or global crises.  Consider everyone else if you possibly have something in common with the man who threw snow into the middle of the street.

I don't think the examples are limited to shoveling snow either.  This same guy would probably not clean up after his dog if it crapped on his neighbors lawn.  He probably parks in handicap spots and is one of those crabby people who doesn't give out candy at Halloween.  I will go as far to say that this guy would even play loud music outside on  school night knowing that his neighbors have young children who want to go to bed early.  Basically, what I'm trying to say is be considerate of other, not like they nimrod who threw snow in the middle of the street.  You'll find that when you are considerate of others they are usually also considerate towards you, leading to a far more pleasant and relaxing life. 

Travelling to the Tropics

I always wondered how it would feel to spend the holidays in a tropical climate.  In a few hours I will experience Christmas in the tropics when my flight touches down in sunny Florida.  My father moved to Florida in February and I will be traveling with my sister to see him.  You hear so often about the horror stories of holiday travel; especially the chaos in airports.  I'm actually looking forward to all of the shenanigans people will be pulling due to the increased volume and urgency of travel during this time of year.  Hopefully I will witness some memorable outbursts that I can share with everyone. 

In any case I look forward to my temporary escape from the cold weather; sorry to rub it in your face if you're stuck in PA or if you're further north.  I once thought that at the earliest possible opportunity I would leave this place for a more tropical climate.  For instance, if I were to pen a best-seller or win the lottery I could buy some lovely beachfront property in Key West, or possibly Maui (Hawaii).  I have since realized that although a change in climate can be pleasant, a life without the important people in our lives would be colder than any Mid-Atlantic winter.  The warmth in life is not in the weather but in those we hold dear.  Spend the holidays with those you cherish most, and reflect on all of the wonderful things in your life.  And if you can't be with the people who you love dearly for any reason (because your large extended family is more frustrating/annoying than loving), there's always eggnog or your drink of choice to get you back to your happy place ;)

Don't let the money get you down

So I've hit a little rut when it comes to finances and it's really gotten me down lately.  I won't get into details but I feel that my woes represent one of the most stressful aspects of contemporary society.  Money, or a lack there of, can cause us a great deal of stress because it usually leads to debt, or a very limited budget.  New clothes, vacations, and other luxury items must be put on hold in order to pay off bills and debts.  As the money enters your bank account it quickly leaves when your checks are cashed, leaving you to scrape by until the next paycheck.  When times are tough it's important to focus on the positive things in life and to learn from your financial struggles.  For instance, I am a student and I work part-time, so my expenses, even though they are few, usually match if not outweigh my income.  I don't have very much money to spend on myself but I do what I can and I try to focus on the positive things in life such as my friends, family, future, and interests.  Moving forward I will always make sure to keep tight budgets and not spend more money than I have, plus invest my savings so that my savings will grow and not simply sit in an account.  I believe the key to financial troubles as well as any others in life is to stay positive and to focus on the things that you can control.  If you're income can't cover your expenses than maybe pick up a second job, or rework your expenses and eliminate things that are not completely necessary (going out to the bar, extra cable channels, new clothes).  It's also crucial to learn from mistakes and not repeat them so that you don't place yourself into a pattern of accruing debt and not having the ability to pay it back.  It's also imperative to keep in mind that things will improve if you work hard to change an undesirable situation.  Everything that I have ever seen in life has shown me that the universe rewards hard work, so work hard for what you want and even if you don't achieve your original goal, good things will probably happen along the way. 

Why is buying gifts for people so difficult?

Today I struggled mightily when picking out holiday gifts for somebody. I recently decided that I don't like giving or receiving gift cards because they are a cop out from buying actual gifts.  Gift cards take no thought and hold no connection to the person who gave them to you.  For example if your aunt got you a jacket you would think of her when receiving compliments on your jacket.  When you buy something with a gift card you don't think, "Oh I bought this with the gift card that so and so gave me".  There's that extra step of the card translating to the gift, that creates a disconnect between the gift giver and his/her recipient.  So back to the main question, why is it so difficult to buy gifts? And is this why so many people take the easy route and just go for gift cards?

I think we live in a society where everything is at our fingertips, making it very difficult to purchase gifts in this day and age.  For example, you don't want to buy somebody a CD because the person may have already downloaded the CD on itunes without you knowing.  Somebody could even just purchase the songs that they like on itunes, saving them money.  Also with On Demand and Netflix many people refrain from buying movies and seasons of television shows on DVD.  Why buy something that you already pay for with your monthly cable bill? Books could also be obsolete because of the new E-Readers and Amazon kindles.  Electronic readers allow people to have numerous books on one small piece of technology.  The electronic books are even less expensive than paper books, representing that e-books will save buyers money in the long run.  All of these items are located in a bookstore such as Borders, which is conveniently where I work.  Naturally I want to take advantage of my discount by shopping there but I've struggled in finding suitable gifts without bluntly asking the person what he/she wants.  I wonder if I can attribute the difficulty of gift buying to the society that we live in which allows us to have everything at our fingertips because of our technology.  Or maybe my conundrum begs the larger question of how well do we really know our close family and friends when we struggle greatly with the simple task of choosing a suitable gift for them during the holidays?  Forgive me for generalizing but please chime in if you also struggle with buying gifts for those close to you during the holidays. 

Christmas Holiday and Winter Blues

Everything about the winter seems depressing; it's cold, dark, and wet.  And sometimes it's windy making it even worse.  Sure snow can be fun when you have no other obligations  but overall I am not the biggest fan of the cold weather months.  I'm pretty sure that I'm not alone in my detest for the cold, as many seem to suffer for the condition known as 'winter blues'.  I also find it convenient that at the peak of the most depressing season a holiday exists that involves the exchange of gifts.  It almost seemed like society created the gift giving of Christmas in order to raise people's spirits so that they are less depressed in winter time.  I mean technically isn't Christmas supposed to be the celebration of the birth of Jesus? I'm not a Christian so I'm no expert on the subject, so I wonder how the whole gift giving thing got worked into the birth of Jesus.  Somebody once told me that Saint Nicholas aka Santa Clause would give needy children toys way back in the day, earning his claim to fame.  So Christmas morphed from the birth of Jesus to needy kids receiving toys and then to everyone receiving gifts, needy or wealthy...I think.

I'm certainly not against Christmas in any way; when done correctly it can represent a wonderful tradition of giving and togetherness for families and friends.  It just frustrates me how the tradition that should bring happiness and joy results in angst from so many towards the fact that they have to spend money on gifts and host family members.  I wonder about the relationship betweenthe anxiety and frustration during holiday time and the winter blues.  Was the Christmas holiday created to combat winter blues or does it actually perpetuate the phenomenon because people feel pressured by all of the money and preparations required by the holiday? I feel that Santa and Frosty should make everyone jolly, yet I find so many people to be most bitter around the holidays.  I guess my main conundrum is Christmas Holiday...the cause or cure for the winter blues? Please share your thoughts.

Sleeping in Messed me up

I slept until 11:30 am today.  I think that may be the latest that I have slept all year long; I did not set an alarm and just kept sleeping until Devon and Anna woke up (I slept over last night).  Now it's 2:36 am and I feel wide awake.  Sleep cycles are annoying like that but at least now I have more to write about.  Tomorrow (technically it's already Sunday but I don't believe the new day begins until the sun rises) should be exciting, Eagles game and I will resume consistent exercise.  I was working out intensely on a regular basis until this past semester's workload really picked up, draining all of my physical and mental energy.  Exercise is excellent because it makes you feel so alive and very good about yourself.  I find that exercise raises both energy and self-confidence levels.  Taking care of one's body is one of the most important things to do in life because our bodies are our vessels.  Personally I find it a huge turn off when a lady does not take care of her body.  Some people may think I'm shallow for finding women who do not care for themselves unattractive but luckily in this country I still have the ability to think freely...for now.  The way I see it, if someone will not put the time and effort to care for their own body what else are they not putting effort into? Probably a lot of areas such as friends, family and work.  I'm not cruel and I think that everyone has the potential to do great things, but I harbor no sympathy for quitters or people who do nothing to change their lives when they are unhappy in their situations and have resources at their disposal.

Exercise and eating well are key aspects in my life and I believe they should be part of everyone's life.  So many people pollute their bodies with toxins on a daily basis, usually encouraging unhappiness and a quicker death.  The lack of motivation exhibited by many individuals to look and feel good about themselves scares me.  Nobody should ever be content in misery and accept it as an inevitable truth of life.  With hard work we can all change our situations, either with physical health and fitness or other facets of life such as careers and relationships.  The universe rewards hard work and punishes stagnation with the condition that so many people are stuck in and refuse to climb out of known as misery. 

Should I keep it PG?

This is a question to those who choose to read my scribbles: Should I discuss illicit topics such as sex, drugs, and violence on this page?  I only ask because it is currently public and I have the option of making it a bit more private because it could contain adult content.  I personally would choose to refrain from the more intense aforementioned topics simply because of my future career choice.  As a future high school teacher I would not want my professional credibility and integrity questioned because of content that I publicly post on the internet.  In any case I would be happy to share my thoughts on more adult topics in a more private setting than this current forum, so please give me your thoughts about topics that you would like discussed.  I may consider a newsletter or something that would be sent to those who would like to hear about more adult topics, and I welcome any suggestions or opinions on the matter. I would also like to thank everyone who has chosen to read my words thus far, and I promise to continue to share my thoughts and feelings with the world (at least the world that has internet access). 

Love Comes in all Forms

So last night I went out with a few friends in West Chester to celebrate the end of the semester and the fact that I can once again consume alcoholic beverages because I am no longer on medication.  It was a wonderful night filled with lots of drinking and dancing, and ended with some delicious late night eats which consisted of some Trader Joe's dumplings.  I really enjoy spending time with Devon and Anna, my friends from West Chester who happen to be a lesbian couple.  They have one of the most beautiful and amicable relationships I have seen and constantly remind me that romantic love between two people is possible and can be remarkable.  There are times when I doubt the institution of marriage and the possibility of truly spending the majority of my life with one person and being happy.  I fear at times that after a period of five or six years I will become bored and lose interest, moving on to somebody else or to the single life.  Couples like Devon and Anna and my close friend Kyle and his girlfriend Sam constantly remind me that love is out there, and is the most amazing thing that us humans have to offer this world.  I am blessed to have such people in my life who can bring me back to reality when I feel that I am destined to spend the rest of my life alone, because love is just a chemical reaction in the brain that fades after five to six years when the sexual excitement of another human being no longer exists.  I can't remember where I heard it but someone once said a life without love is a wasted life, and I tend to agree. It's kind of like the argument between evolution and creationism or religion versus science.  I believe when it comes to love we all have to have faith that the connection between souls is not a measurable phenomenon, but one that goes beyond the physical world to something much deeper and more significant. 

Eagles vs. Giants in a huge NFC East Showdown

So I originally intended to write two blogs, one for regular every day happenings and another one for sports and specifically football.  I set up a football blog today as well but that site was quite confusing so I think I'm just going to use this one as a double forum unless I receive a significant amount of opposition.  In any case, did I mention that I am a huge football fan? Well I am, I believe that American Football is the best game on earth and watching it gives me great joy.  My teams of choice are the Philadelphia Eagles for the NFL and the Penn State Nittany Lions for NCAA Subdivision (Formerly Division I-A)College Football.  Really I enjoy any football when the game is played well but as a fan you've got to choose a team and those are mine.  I have often dreamed of becoming or sportswriter or sportscaster and I sometimes regret not following that career path with my undergraduate studies.  If you're reading this ESPN or Comcast Sportsnet and are looking for a football analyst feel free to contact me for an interview.

Anyway down to business, this week the mighty Philadelphia Eagles travel to the disgusting swamplands of New Jersey to face the New York Giants (doesn't make sense I know, a New York Team that plays in Jersey).  As much as I detest the Giants and the adolescent boy who runs their offense I must admit that they have a strong team this year.  They have plenty of talent on the offense with a young group of wide receivers who can catch the ball well and two experienced running backs who have had some success in the league.  They have one of the best if not the best front-fours in the entire NFL and got to Michael Vick a lot in the first meeting.  Regardless, the Giants usually finish the year poorly, and I personally believe that neither Peyton nor Eli Manning (Giants QB) is a cold weather quarterback, growing up in the deep south and playing their college ball there.  I think that the Giants secondary is also very vulnerable and in the first meeting the Eagles shot themselves in the foot with numerous dropped passes.  They have nobody who can match up with Maclin and Jackson one-on-one and I see Maclin looking to bounce back after a disappointing performance last week.  The Giants are banged up, missing wide receiver Steve Smith and Mario Manningham is not 100 percent.  Hakeem Nicks is still a talented receiver but the Eagles defense did a nice job last week against the Dallas wide outs and I see that staying the same for this week.  You may think I'm crazy but I feel like the defense is improving, as they showed lots of different looks last week.  They've reduced third down blitzes as well which I believe only benefits them.  Overall I am not too concerned about this game, I see a similar outcome to the first game with the Eagles winning by 13.  My score prediction is Eagles 30 Giants 13, feel free to comment with your thoughts.  

Opening Up to New Possibilities

I'm beginning my blogging journey in the hopes that it will help me to become a better writer.  You see I want to be a writer someday, but until I am published I'll have to do something else to pay the bills and survive.  That's where teaching comes in, High School English specifically.  I discovered my chosen career path after twenty two and a half  years and one wasted B.A in Psychology from the wonderful Penn State University.  I would love to run a test on the water supply of state college and see what the put into it; or maybe it's the air.  Needless to say the place is just majestic and I would love to be there right now.  Instead I'm living in my mother's house finishing up my second round of a college education.  Only this time I am taking graduate courses at West Chester University, a much less majestic institution than the aforementioned Penn State.  With another year to go as of today I am well on my way to shaping the minds of many young adolescents, hoping that they will leave me as better writers with a greater love for reading than when they first walked into my classroom.  I'm very happy to be done fall semester as of today. This was my most difficult semester yet and the month off for winter break is much needed.  I will now go to my last final exam period of the semester where I will submit my assignments and then proceed to get absolutely hammered with a couple of friends in downtown West Chester.  Don't worry I have a place to sleep and I will not be driving after my mass consumption of alcoholic beverages.  I don't quite know when and how to end this so I guess I'll call it an evening with this entry with more to come in the near future.